coffee, doughnuts, cigarettes, and jet lag.

but not necessarily in that order.

it's 7:30 a.m. and travesty of all travesties -- not only am i AWAKE -- but i've already been out and about and had a MEAL (or what in some countries could probably feed a small family).

since returning from africa, my internal clock is rather fucked up. the first night i got back (after what was 25-30 hours of travel time to get home), i fell asleep at 4 p.m. and stayed asleep until about midnight. luckily i was able to sleep again for periodic naps throughout the day (probably because i brought back a little taste of the bird flu...*note: that's a joke and exaggeration if anyone from the CDC happens to be trolling my blog. don't arrest me). so the next day i slept from about 8 p.m. to 4 a.m. and last night was a 10 p.m. to 5:30 a.m.-er. i guess that's progress.

sadly, once i finally got adjusted to the time change and exhausting travel to get there, it was time to leave south africa. it seems it may take me about a week to adjust to NYC time again -- at which point i will be leaving for europe. hm. so much for well-adjusted.

i just had 3 doughnuts and a cup of a coffee. this is my third day on a doughnut-coffee binge. this is an unhappy pattern. i was just beginning to experience the weight-loss benefits of having a minor cold and here i am counteracting it by stuffing deep-fried rings of dough, covered (and sometimes filled) with enormous emounts of sugar and who knows what else. i am a slave to comfort food and always will be.

speaking of comfort food, i accidentally smoked my first cigarette in about 2.5 years yesterday. i was doing a photo shoot for Italian Max magazine...and they had me in a leather jacket with a black cigarette with the circles under my eyes accentuated rather than covered (as if i need help in that arena). it was for a profile on actors and lucky for me they wanted me to play the character of a strung-out grave-robbing junkie (honestly, i couldn't have been more excited about that). well it's hard to hold a cigarette in your mouth for photos for a long period of time and not accidentally inhale...and fuck, i don't miss those things. but kids, wait for the March issue of Italian Max cuz it was totally worth it -- i am SOOOO excited about the photos. they made me look like a bad-ass tough guy. if you squint your eyes a little, i almost look like a top!